Fruit, Depression, and the Kicking Baby

Today, Evan and I got in what can only be described as a terrible fight, even though we never actually spoke. He called me a few days ago to tell me in a very strange attitude that he had something really good to tell me but he didn't have the words, so he would email it later. The email finally came and it just said "I want to go to the doctor's appointment with you. I want to make sure you're healthy and the baby is healthy. I want to be in the baby's life, no matter what." I was shocked, but I had a very uneasy feeling for some reason. It was exactly what I wanted, so why was I scared?

Then, it hit me. I had a horrible feeling in my heart, and I was afraid that his crazy ex had come back into the picture. Now, Evan and I are not together, by any means, and if he wanted to be with someone else, then he can do whatever he wants, but this girl, let's call her Mandy, is PSYCHO. She stalks me on myspace, she has actually had friends call Evan to see if he was with me, and when he didn't answer her third call, she would start to send him insane angry text messages. Then, she moved on to harassing me through texts and emails. It got horribly out of hand, and Evan keeps her life away from me, but he has said she is a psycho spoiled bitch. So, why did I feel like she was back? I decided to settle this fear, I would ask him. I called him. No answer. Ok, he's at home and busy. I emailed him. The only reply I got was "When is the doctor's appointment?" But no answer to my question. I asked again. Still, I got the same email reply. This time I sent him a text message asking what was going on, and again, I got an email with the exact same thing. Something weird was happening, and I lost it. I started texting, and calling like crazy wanting to know who he thought he was treating me like crap. Then, three unanswered calls later, my fourth call was met with the message you get when someone blocks your number.

I got an email saying he would not play games and he wanted to know about the doctor's appointment.

So, I spent the day crying. Meanwhile, the baby went nuts. I felt the first movements today during all the chaos. It was almost like he was screaming "Stop fighting!" It only made me cry more. During all this depression, when I would usually be eating chocolate and ice cream, all I wanted was strawberries and sour grapes for some reason. When we ran out of grapes, I tore the kitchen apart, trying a plumb, and orange, and some yogurt. None of them hit the craving, and now I just want strawberries and to stop crying.